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JAN GARRETT

Gypsy Midwife, Songs for Soul Retrieval

Story Behind the Title

1. It's the first line of the first song on the album, "Holy Mother," about the fierce love of the Divine Feminine, which I wrote in Aug. 1998 on the 3rd day of my Vision Quest solo fast up on Mount Wilson, the Utes' Storm-Maker mountain near Telluride.

2. My own Mom, who left this world bravely at age 82 last April, was born out on the farm in Valley County Nebraska with the country doctor and (no kidding) a gypsy midwife in attendance. The baby came in with a caul over her face, which the wise woman pronounced a blessing because it meant she would be gifted with "the sight." (It seems that I also somehow inherited "the sound," for better or for worse.)

3. For me, it's about the whole process of bringing this soul work through. The gypsy part honors mystery and magic, the invisible worlds. And the experienced midwife.....competent, compassionate, and down-to-earth.....attends the births, the deaths, and all the living music in-between.

As for the subtitle, "Songs for Soul Retrieval," it was suggested by a friend who knows me well. The music was born out of my own raw and personal encounters with the achingly ordinary and beautiful stuff of my life. So first and foremost it's about MY soul retrieval. If it works for anybody else I am deeply honored.

For me, Soul lives in the dark fertile places I've been avoiding and resisting: The grief, the pain, all the ugly uncomfortable touchy areas, the really scary stuff, the dread. My family. Forgiveness. The silence. And also it resides potently in my own deep and un-utterable joy, my dearest heart's desires. That's where the Big energy is locked up. So, on the dark end of the spectrum I scan through my life and notice my personal taboos, the places where I try to make tricky little deals with God, praying furtively "Please dear God, anything but THAT." So of course, that's what comes up, the underground journey we all know about.

But here's the interesting part which quite surprised me: What also opened up and has demanded my full attention in this process is the extreme light side, the breathtakingly vivid possibilities, the gorgeous dreams and potentials I hadn't yet allowed myself to enter into because I thought they might be too beautiful, too much to hope for, just too much love and grace and redemption for me to handle and accept and live with.

So, talk about a stretch!

This album has been a gracious gift for me, a labor of love, perseverance and trust. I offer it to you as a healing and a blessing, doing my best to remember who is looking out through these eyes. Thank you for listening.